It’s Been Seven Hours and 15 Days

Issue 94

Jul 27, 2023

Nothing compares to you, dear friends. Nothing.

Not him, her, them, they, or it. You’re 1000% unique. Cliche, yes. But entirely true and comforting when you take in the enormity of it. It’s magnificent.

I’m sorry to capitalize on Sinéad O’Connor’s passing by using her words to lure you into my newsletter. I did check with her before she passed, and she blessed me with full rights. It seems she’s a real fan of The Letter.

I wasn’t a crazy fan of hers, but I wasn’t not a fan. She’s a talent, and her bald head made headlines in my youth. In honor of her, and for her contribution to my life, rest in peace, Sinéad. Nothing compares 2 U.

Living With Less

Debbie Millman was interviewed on The Good Life Project and made a statement about change I find remarkably true in my lived experience.

When you’re on the precipice of change, the only way to envision a future is with less than you have now—less money, power, title, people, status, comfort, or any number of things. What you can’t conceive of is all you’ll gain.

When you give up someone or something, or they give up you, you’ll live with less. Period. And you’ll gain more. This is how massive change works. Roll with it.

A Letter Within the Letter

I’ve stalled on writing John back this week because life outside prison, my life, is busy. There’s no doubt he’s becoming more comfortable in his words, even in the presentation of his words.

In my last letter, I wrote:

New paper, I see. I wonder if you have enough stamps for our correspondence or if it would be helpful to you if I sent some (or money for them)? Please let me know. I’m new to this :)

He’s adamant I don’t send money or stamps. One has to earn such things, and apparently, he has not.

Just know Simone, I’m fine - Thank You for the thought of stamps.

When I wrote I couldn’t fathom living with his sleep pattern of 90-minute cycles and wondered whether he could or would wear earplugs, he wrote:

I’ve been in this 90 minute sleep pattern for 60 years. I’m haunted after the war. Ear plugs. No - my friend. I need to hear my surroundings 24-7. Even asleep I never get deep sleep. What is rim [sic] sleep. My rim sleep is a moment. I am pretty aware of my surroundings. All the time.

When I asked if he had friends, he wrote about his friends on the outside, mostly his brothers from the Vietnam War—most of which are dead (ten of 12). One deposits money in SQ bank account now and again. He went on to talk about friends on the inside:

People know me. I don’t really know them. I acknowledge everyone, that’s just being human to everyone. I know their names - but not there [cant dechiper word] or the why there here. What matters is how they are here and treat others here.

This passage screams micro-society to my Sociology-major brain. No matter their past, the men live amongst each other, like neighbors or city dwellers—like we do, just different.

He left me with this passage—sweet in its sentiment, jumbled in its delivery:

There is nothing more expensive than raising children as a mother. I am proud to know a mother that is there for her kids. There’s never enough money to do for them.

He must know, though doesn’t, this has been a hard parenting week for me. There’s great light at the possible end of the tunnel, so let’s all cross our fingers, and I’ll keep you posted.

Emma and mom, Owen and mom. (No filter, though I think that’s obvious.)

Spoiler alert: Therapy’s ‘bout to happen in multiple configurations in my family! You’ll want to stay tuned :)

PS: I Googled nuclear families because it came to mind—but I didn’t think I lived in one. I don’t. The traditional definition of a nuclear family is a family unit that includes two married parents of opposite genders and their biological or adopted children living in the same residence. Not restricting.

July 31, 2023

Monday is World Ranger Day—celebrated worldwide on July 31st to commemorate Rangers killed or injured in the line of duty and to celebrate the work Rangers do to protect the planet's natural treasures and cultural heritage.

Ranger Covey and Point Reyes National Seashore.

If your boyfriend is a ranger, you can tell him you love him and thank him for his service. “I love you, Stephen. Thank you for your service.” If you’re without a ranger, head to a national park and hug one.

Locals, how about Point Reyes?

Humming Birds

It’s not a typo. I wanted the title to read as a verb-plus-noun, not a noun.

Hummingbird feeders are a delightfully inexpensive gift for children and adults alike. They bring enjoyment to all—birds included. Take your pick of models. I’m not sure it matters, but the clear nectar does (red is bad). Stephen makes his own—shocking! Here’s a recipe.

That’s all, folks. Goodnight to you and yours🌙. Simone