Never Eat Shredded Wheat

Issue 55 is a compass

Oct 26, 2022

4:20 pm. Woman sits in car in a burgundy romper, jean jacket, clogs, and a soon-to-overheat laptop on her lap. Clack, clack, clack. She types the following:

Dears, for a moment, it’s just us.
One kid is at sewing while the other has his hairs cut. I’m in the front seat of my parked car, arms pinned to my body, typing like a T-Rex.
A portion of The Letter is already written. Its threads are loose and its title has not revealed itself. In time, it does. I’ve done this long enough to know I’m weaving a quilt. The edges are frayed and the pattern is blurry — nonetheless, before midnight, a textile will be drenched, tip to tail, in words.
My laptop is atop my lap, where it doesn’t belong. My mid-section is on fire and I’m going infertile. My laptop overheats at the first sign of work. Convenient.
Shortly, I’ll retrieve my boy from his haircut, exchange money with the man, pick up Sister at sewing, take them to dinner at Joe’s (Hi Gabe!), and head home with a whirlwind of needs to come.
In this moment, though, it’s just us. Take a deep breath with me. 💨
“Okay, I’m done,” Owen texts.

So much happens in a week. I often want to tell you everything. I know you’d love it. But once it’s out there, I can’t take it back, and that’s the trouble with exposing oneself the way I do. I have restraint, just barely.

Keep Tracker

If you’re a festival-goer or just a person with a kid who likes to wander the neighborhood, invest in an Air Tag, and keep track of their whereabouts. The holders range from necklaces to keychains to backpack animal collars (some people’s kids are animals).

Air Tag 1-pack

Air Tag 4-pack

Put them on anything you want to keep track of. Emma chose these necklaces to hold hers. You can find something more sophisticated on Etsy. Like any accessory, wear it only when desired.

(Ever misplaced a kid on Halloween? I have. ‘Nuff said.)

When Customer Service Goes North

So often, we’re disappointed with mass-produced, poor customer service. Rarely do we celebrate the good stuff. A recent cat food order I made on Chewy.com went south. The cats didn’t like the fishy paste, and I’m on a diet.

I turned to the website’s chat feature — expecting very little — from chat to refund in under five minutes.

Chewy rocked the customer experience. That’s all—just some good news.

Catch the last line? 🐱

I Can Stand It

You don’t need it, but you’ll like it. This iPhone stand is a chef’s kiss — sturdy and flexible. I bought two. You’re welcome.

What’s In a Name?

The origin story of a company’s name delights me. This week’s companies are:

Kirkland Signature

Why is it called Kirkland? Costco-brand products are named in honor of their original flagship warehouse in Kirkland, Washington. When their first choice of names didn’t clear legal, they went with the second best, Kirkland.

Goop

For her brand’s name, Gweneth Paltrow wanted a word that meant nothing and could mean anything. When Brand Strategist Peter Arnell joked to GP that all successful internet companies have double Os in their name, they made an O-sandwich with her initials. Goop, there it is!

West Side Story

(Who cares about West’s side of the story.)

Adidas cut Ye for his repeated antisemitic and offensive remarks.

Bye-bye, Ye-ye. It’s all downhill from here.

If you’ve made it this far, do you know what the title of this issue means?

Your prescription: Change directions. Until next week…

10:12 pm. Woman sits in bed. Peaceful guitar plucks from the speaker of her firey laptop. Her son sits beside her revealing his worries about the following day. Knowing she’s made typos and you will forgive her, she hits publish.