Welcome.
I have ants. Living with them feels dirty. Killing them feels dirty. What’s left? Loving them.
Trillions of roommates are intense. We get along well enough, but I vacillate between admiration and murder. My inconsistency can’t be easy to live with.
When I’m in awe I want to know everything about them. They pass information like tiny telephones. If one senses trouble, the others mobilize in milliseconds. Imagine their social media strategy. Have you seen how many followers they have?
When I’m murderous, well, you know…
In other news, my newsletter had the name, Two-Cents Simone. It may still, but my friend Michael wrote to me: “2 cents is cheap. What you're writing is deep, dense, rich stuff. Just my 2 cents.” Turns out, Tommy said this to Michael first, but Tommy’s Canadian and he didn’t want to hurt my feelings.
Hence, Issue 07 has no name.
Wednesday
6:00 am boot camp. Home by 6:45. I’m all about the 30-minute workout.
I bought a used standing desk on Facebook Marketplace. What a productivity booster. 🚀
Thursday
Our neighbor’s daughter gave Emma old ripped jeans. They were on her like ants to sugar. “You’re not wearing distressed denim at seven,” I said. The same day, Emma called me out for saying “fuck” five times. I have standards.
Friday
Molly M. Designs has wall art/eye candy for you and yours. She’s having a sale this Friday. Her papercuts make my heart sing.
Saturday
I dig the podcast How I Built This with Guy Raz. Guy interviews founders of companies you’ve probably heard of. Jump in and listen. They’re all good.
I hate to name-drop (or do I?), but Guy Raz uses this pizza oven, and the pizzas are pretty great. If you love someone enough to buy it new, do it. If not, look for used.
While we’re shopping, put these on your feet. Babas are shoes and slippers in one. They’re beyond com-functional. I don’t have the furry ones yet, but I do have them sans fur and they’re 👌
Tip: I wear 8/8.5 and I buy 39. Sabah says their shoes stretch. They don’t.
Sunday
Owen’s birthday lunch with Grandpa last Sunday.
Monday
An excerpt from an essay I wrote:
Some say ADD is over-diagnosed. Could it be there’s more ADD to diagnose? Scientists are working on why. While they do, I’ll offer my two cents: Thirty years of media, chemicals, modified foods, and our changing world have caught up to us, and we’re seeing the repercussions in our children. The world has changed. We have changed. The people we’re spawning have changed.
Read ADD Drugs in the full.
Tuesday
The kids are off school this week. As I type, Owen is cooking filet mignon. I’m dying. I don’t know what Emma’s doing.
While he ruins my kitchen, I’m tossing these sentences around about my newsletter. What says you?
“Crack a smile and think a while. Weekly wit and wisdom delivered to your inbox.”
Hi and Bye
Hello new subscribers! Hello OGs.
Tell me how this newsletter landed for you.
Bonus: Ants can lift 20x their weight. I can’t do a pull-up.
The End
Have a beautiful week, everyone. Happiest Thanksgiving! 🦃
I am obsessed with Poshmark. Get the app. Find your favorite brands’ lines from past seasons and some vintage finds (or just stuff that is now out of stock on your favorite brands)